Tomorrow is a day of packing, making lists, checking the lists and preparing for a week up north. Once again I'll be at SALTS - Survivors of Abuse Leadership Training. For the past 9 years I've been a co-leader, taking our participants through a personal grace group journey to understand themselves and their story better while learning to lead others through this journey of restoration.

Restoration from what? From wounding, disappointment, unmet longings, trauma and struggles with relationships and life in general.

If you are interested, check out www.ohmin.org or check out Open Hearts Ministry in Facebook. There you will get the bigger picture of what we are called to do.

Next week is a bit of a gift for me. I will be the participant looking more deeply into my dignity and my depravity. Am I afraid? No! Am I curious? Yes! Will there be tough times, tears, a fight against shame and old lies? Yes! Will I be sad and glad? Yes and maybe both at the same time! We call that ambivalence.

What will I have heard from God by Saturday morning - a week away? That remains a mystery to be revealed by Him as the week progresses.

If past experience is any measuring stick, I'll receive warm hugs, lots of smiles, hopeful words after difficult moments, and be reminded that spiritual community is often much more safe and comforting that biological family. I'm going home in some respects to revisit friends, colleagues, fellow participants -- those I can truly be myself with, knowing I'll be held in high esteem, cared for well, held accountable in truth with grace and I will grow in areas that still need growth.

If you are curious about the process, the week, or the ministry, check out www.ohmin.org or connect with me via blog or at embracedbyhope@juno.com. That's my e-mail for the ministry I direct here in Georgia. I'd love to chat with you about restoration in your own life.

I've had a longing in the past to own a little red sports car. I do come from a racing family and have some racing blood in me. Image probably also propelled my longing. Wouldn't I look spiffy in a little red sports car!

It's a really impractical dream. I'm always carting home a tree or bush or several huge bags of mulch or dirt, not to speak of an old chair or goodie I might find discarded along the road. Where would I put any of that in a little red sports car. Also to be considered is the initial cost of such a toy, the price of insurance and the cost of gas to propel it.


On our way to the Arc d'Triumph in Paris, we encountered quite a few racy little cars in red and black in the parking garage. This one I'm standing by probably cost around $225,000. God hasn't deposited that kind of money in my earthly band account so I guess this little red number is out of the question.

Actually, I don't have that dream anymore. It was a silly one and God has been the wiser not to fulfill it.

There are other dreams and longings that God isn't fulfilling for me. Some aren't silly, inappropriate or impractical. They seem quite reasonable from my point of view. So what do I do with these unmet longings and dreams. Will I wait in hope and faith. Will I take "NO" from God with a pleasant attitude. Will I trust that He really does know what my future is and what I really need? Will I trust and live in faith while waiting on unmet longings and dreams? It can be a tough place to sit and sit well. Right now I'm sitting well. This morning I wasn't.

No, God doesn't likely have a little red sports car in my life plan. But He does have other things for me. Will I surrender my longings and dreams to Him and trust that the ones He honors are those that are best for me?

I long to! Now........that's a good longing.

This cross stands in the American Cemetery above Normandy beach and the Omaha invasion in France. The writing on the cross doesn't carry a name or rank. It says "here lies a soldier known only to God......." I was overwhelmed to find so many just like this one - unknown - only to God. I gently rubbed my hand over each one I came to as I walked the cemetery, grateful for the sacrifice of so many on my behalf.

I wondered what determination and courage it took for these young men to travel to a world they didn't know, to fight for people they would never meet, to leave behind families who would never know their final hours, to stand so valiantly for a cause they so strongly believed in.

And because of their sacrifice and the sacrifice of many like them, I live free to choose where I worship, what I will eat and wear, when I will speak and what I choose to speak, and many more freedoms that I often take for granted.

I am grateful and moved to be more conscious of the grace I live under - that which God bestowed on me and the freedoms I enjoy - bought for me by the lives of many I will never know. It's a sobering and hopeful thought.

Will I stand and sacrifice as willingly for the causes I believe in? How about you?